Sermon for December 21, 2025: Righteous Love based upon Matthew 1:18-25

Matthew 1:18-25 The Birth of Jesus the Messiah (New Revised Standard Version Updated Edition)

Now the birth of Jesus the Messiah took place in this way. When his mother Mary had been engaged to Joseph, but before they lived together, she was found to be pregnant from the Holy Spirit. Her husband Joseph, being a righteous man and unwilling to expose her to public disgrace, planned to divorce her quietly. But just when he had resolved to do this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife, for the child conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will bear a son, and you are to name him Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins.” All this took place to fulfill what had been spoken by the Lord through the prophet: “Look, the virgin shall become pregnant and give birth to a son, and they shall name him Emmanuel,” which means, “God is with us.” When Joseph awoke from sleep, he did as the angel of the Lord commanded him; he took her as his wife but had no marital relations with her until she had given birth to a son, and he named him Jesus.

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     I was talking to my mom this week. Since my granny can’t get out to see a Christmas pageant at a church, mom is thinking about trying to organize a tiny one with my niece and nephew. My nephew Sol is a great reader, so he’ll be the narrator. My niece Lyla, with her big imagination, will probably be an angel with one line “(be not afraid”) or a shepherd with some sheep or maybe both. Mom asked me about what part of the story to have the kids read. I asked, “How much do you want to have to explain to Sol about marriage and pregnancies?” Not much, as it turned out. So, that meant Mary’s visitation from the angel in Luke 1 and today’s reading from Matthew 1 were out. They’re gonna start the story with Matthew 2. Explaining a census seems a little simpler than explaining why Joseph might not have been excited to hear that his fiancée was pregnant.

     There are some Bible stories that I think that people who have heard them frequently forget how strange or scandalous they can be the first time you hear them. The stories around Jesus’ birth are that kind of Bible story. The Advent and Christmas seasons are full of sweet scenes of the little Holy Family. Meanwhile, when we turn to the Bible story itself, we are reminded of the real stakes for this couple if they choose to do what God asks of them. People have been, and are to this day, ostracized from family and community under circumstances that are quite similar to those described in our reading. Two thousand years into this Jesus movement, when so often in the West the word “Christian” is used to mean “respectable” and “well-behaved,” it is good to be reminded of the scandal that began our relationship with Christ. Remembering the scandalous nature of the Incarnation can help us be braver in a world that too often prefers we act politely rather than justly.

     Given the differences in culture, the challenges in translating Greek to English, and years of tradition surrounding this story, the precise nature of Joseph and Mary’s relationship in Matthew is confusing. The New Revised Standard version describes them as being “engaged.” In our culture, this means not yet married but planning to be married at some point. This is how Eugene Park understands their relationship in his commentary. Mitzi Minor reads it a little differently in hers. She adds some context to help us understand what marriages in respectable families would look like in this era.

     Minor argues that a better translation indicates that they are married but not yet living together. She notes that marriages in this era were economic arrangements made between the fathers of a man and a woman with the ultimate goal of producing “legitimate heirs” for the household of the man. While it is clear that these kinds of households could be loving and something that we would call love could grow between the couple, Minor says, “love wasn’t the reason for the marriage.” Mary and Joseph’s marriage had been arranged and was already what we would consider “legal.” However, for some reason, they were not living together. Minor suggests that maybe the house wasn’t done or maybe Joseph was busy with an apprenticeship.

     Apparently, though, regardless of whether you understand them to be engaged or married but not cohabitating, Mary’s pregnancy has come at an inopportune time. If they are not yet married, they should not have been spending time together in a way that would result in pregnancy. If they are married but not yet living together, it would have been assumed that Mary would have had access to suitors other than her husband, and therefore, according to Minor, it would not have been easy to prove that her child was Joseph’s. The easiest explanation for her pregnancy would have been that she had committed adultery.
As Boyung Lee points out in her commentary on this text in our Advent devotional, there were frightening consequences for women suspected of adultery. Deuteronomy 22: 23-24 indicates that even the suspicion of adultery was enough to warrant stoning. Beyond all the dangers of pregnancy as a teenager in first century Palestine, Mary was in danger within her community. And, as Joash Thomas points out in an interesting post about the religious traditions that would have been important to Joseph, Joseph also risked damage to his reputation and future marriage prospects. This is why he initially considers divorce, though he is clear that he wants to do so quietly, in order to protect Mary. The stakes are so high in this story! Life and death and the lineage of an entire family!

     This is why God’s ask and Joseph’s assent are so important. With Mary’s life and Joseph’s family line on the line, an angel shows up in a dream with an invitation to Joseph to further turn his whole life upside down. “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife, for the child conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will bear a son, and you are to name him Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins.” The reasonable thing would have been divorce. The respectable thing would have been divorce. God asked Joseph to do the loving and just thing instead. Stay with Mary and do not make her do this alone.
Lee refers to this as a “theology of proximity.” That is a definition of righteousness and faithfulness that includes actively drawing closer to the vulnerable. It means “aligning ourselves with those at risk,” even if that increases risk to our own selves... even when we are afraid. In his post about Joseph, Thomas points out that Joseph is able to take this kind of risk because building his faith has been a vital part of his life. He is described as a righteous man, but righteousness doesn’t just happen, it’s cultivated. We have historical records of the kinds of faith practices that Joseph might have participated in that could have fortified him for the work of partnering with Mary to raise the Messiah.

     Thomas said that a devout first century Jewish man could have been expected to pray at three different designated times a day. He would have observed the Sabbath and attended services at the synagogue where he would have engaged with Scripture with other attendees. He also had a religious expectation to tithe and care for people who had fewer resources than him. He would have followed religious dietary and other purity laws and fasted according to their traditions. Each one of these activities and all of them together would have helped to build a foundation of receptivity to the Spirit in Joseph’s heart.

     When you know the stories of a different Joseph the dreamer, it might be easier to believe that God would show up in your dreams, too. When you know the story of Abraham and Sarah, it might be easier to imagine that a miraculous pregnancy could change the world. When you know that Isaiah spoke of God-with-us, it might be easier to believe that God would be with you and Mary through this pregnancy and in the Child to come. Thomas argues that Joseph has been preparing for this moment his whole life just by being faithful.

     Boyung Lee says, “God’s work in this world unfolds not through lone heroes, but through the joined hands of those who choose: relationship over self-protection, accompaniment over certainty, and presence over perfection.” In this Advent season, I hope you have connected to the practices that can allow you to say yes when God comes calling. Because, God will call each one of us to be a part of Christ’s entrance into this world. May we be as willing as Joseph to overcome the fear that could stop us, and stand with the ones who need accompaniment the most.

Resources consulted while writing this sermon:
Joash Thomas: https://www.instagram.com/p/DSgMknejyzY/?img_index=3&igsh=MTIzNzNjdjc2Z2JjZw==
J. Andrew Overman's notes on Matthew inThe New Oxford Annotated Bible: The New Revised Standard Version with Apocryphya, ed. Michael Coogan (New York: Oxford University Press, 2001)
Boyung Lee, "When We are Running Out of Hope, God is at Work," from What Do You Fear? Insisting on Hope This Advent, a devotional from A Sanctified Art: https://sanctifiedart.org/what-do-you-fear-advent-devotional-booklet
Mitzi Minor: https://www.workingpreacher.org/commentaries/narrative-lectionary/jesus-as-immanuel-2/commentary-on-matthew-118-25-10
​Eugene Park: https://www.workingpreacher.org/commentaries/revised-common-lectionary/fourth-sunday-of-advent/commentary-on-matthew-118-25-11